Tag Archives: free book

Ladies and Gentlemen, We have a loser!

November 13, 2009   Chuck Allen   4 Comments

A while back I launched a contest for a free book. In that post I blamed the lack of comments on a error in the way I had the blog configured. In case you forgot, the prize was a copy of The Love Dare by Stephen and Alex Kendrick. My wife was tasked with selecting a winner at random from all the comments that contained the word DARE.
And after reviewing all the comments since the contest began, I am proud to announce… “We have a loser!”
Yes, you read that right. It’s me. I’m the loser. I threw a party and nobody came. I only received one comment during the whole contest, and that comment wasn’t even trying for the book (no DARE anywhere.)
Since I’m a man – and married – I have three possible ways to respond:
1. Ignore it and pretend it never happened – I did contemplate this option for a while, but finally decided against it. This option is better used on things that are not recorded in permanent record. I use this option when predictions I make turn out false or when I’m proven wrong in an argument a few days later. It usually takes the form of no reply or possibly with the phrase “I didn’t say that!”
2. Throw a pity party – I’m not sure women know how to throw pity parties as well as men. I think the main reason is that they don’t train for it. Many of us men practice this art a few times every week so we have it down to an art. I actually embraced this option for a while when I realized that my contest was a bust. I contemplated quitting, smashing the site with a baseball bat or wadding it up into a ball and throwing it at the trash can. At that point I remembered that a blog is virtual and can’t be smashed or wadded and had to settle for calling it names. Fortunately, though, I’m married so I gave up the pity party option in favor of number three.
3. Blame my wife – This is the option I finally decided upon. No matter what the situation a married man can always deflect the blame towards his wife. We inherited this behavior from Adam. “The woman that you gave me, she gave it to me to eat.” If we’re late going somewhere, it’s my wife’s fault. If we overspent our budget, it’s my wife’s fault. If my jeans are too tight, it’s my wife’s fault. I am still upset about the time my team lost the game because she didn’t wash my lucky shirt. I’m not sure how, but the fact that no one comments on this blog must be her fault as well. At the very least she should have known this would happen and warned me!
I feel better already. I’m pretty sure option three is what people are referring to when they say “Take it like a man!” It sounds a lot better than the equivalent “Blame your wife!”
What do you think? Is this something wives do as well? Ladies, does your husband utilize any of these options? Let us know what you think in the comments! (If you’re not still ignoring me.)
Read More

I’m Sorry. I was wrong. (And I’m giving away a free book!)

October 29, 2009   Chuck Allen   1 Comment

Man Rule number 487 states that a man can never admit when he’s wrong. Additional penalties apply if he admits to being lost – which is the worst kind of wrong. (And, yes, looking at a map or asking for directions counts as admitting we were wrong.) What some people don’t realize is that marriage vows release a man from this rule. In fact, husbands are expected to admit wrong even when we are not wrong. “I’m sorry. I was wrong.” is one of the first phrases every husband needs to learn.

So it is without fear that I must admit something about which I was wrong. For the past few weeks I have been convinced that the readers of this blog were giving me the silent treatment. With each post I waited, hoping for comments, but none were ever posted. I began to make wild theories that perhaps only wives were reading this and had instituted a secret vow of silence against me. I even imagined some poor husbands trying to post a comment only to be halted by “the glare.” If you’re not familiar with “the glare” it is the look that wives learn at bridal showers that allows them to stop a husband in his tracks. “The glare” quietly and violently speaks with raised eyebrows, “You better think twice before saying anything about me.” For any single guys that are having trouble understanding, just imagine something like a Jedi mind trick without the brown robes.

I even devised a plan to try to overcome the silence. I’m going to give away a book! I don’t mind copying from all the other bloggers I follow and giving away books certainly seems to be the current blogger version of McDonald’s Monopoly game. I had already purchased a copy of The Love Dare with the expectation of giving it away so using it as a peace offering to break the silence seemed like a winning plan.

Then my wife had to step in and prove me wrong. And in true wifely fashion she did it with a casual comment, “I tried to leave a comment on your blog, but it gave me some weird message.” It didn’t take long after that comment to discover that the comment section was not working. I’m not very familiar with Blogger (I usually use Drupal) and had somehow set it to use Captcha for each comment. The template I am using apparently doesn’t work very well with Captcha turned on. Oops. I’m sorry. I was wrong.

I think I have the comments working now, and I still want to give that book away. In fact, I’m thinking this may be just the first book of several. I haven’t read The Love Dare yet – I bought a copy for myself. However, I do have other books on Marriage that I think are awesome. I’ll be doing some reviews and then giving away some of my favorites.

So here’s the deal: Over the next week I will be posting three blog posts. The first one will be “How to Handle the Silent Treatment” followed by thoughts about laundry and a list of perplexing mysteries. If you are interested in winning the book, simply make a comment to any post on the website (even the older ones) and add the text DARE somewhere in the post. Two days after I post the last article I will have my wife select one of those comments at random for the book. I’ll announce the winner and hand deliver the book myself (to the post office.)

So let’s get started! Feel free to comment away (assuming the site will let you.) And quit giving me the silent treatment! :)

Read More